Embracing Your SInglehood: What Couples Are Missing

woman relaxing on the couch

You wake up in the morning, toast some bread, and prepare a mug of coffee. You sit down while waiting, and ask yourself if it’s going to be your morning routine for the rest of your life.

On Saturdays, you sleep in and go out for lunch. In the afternoon, you bring your dirty clothes to a shop for laundry service and maybe take a walk in the park or go to your favorite bookstore. Sometimes, you meet some friends over dinner. But most of the time, you go to the grocery store, restock your fridge, and prepare a meal for one.

Many would probably think this is a dreary life. This is the curse of being single—being single without a social life. But surprisingly, the percentage of people choosing to be single is increasing over the years. It is just a pity that prejudices against single people are still common despite the modern times. Some people still believe that being single means you are undesirable, or ugly, or unattractive.

Because of this idea, what is often sold in the media are couples’ lives. We see couples going on trips, having romantic dinners, and telling stories. If not a couple, then it’s a family. But really, scattered around the globe are several millions of singles who are genuinely not interested in having a relationship at that moment.

You can go wherever you want.

Remember that feeling when you want to go out with friends for the weekend, but your parents didn’t allow you? You promised that one day you would be free to decide on your own. But when you have a partner, where you go is not just your decision. It’s delusional to say that there is a perfect someone out there who will be ok if you just call and say you’re flying to the Bahamas the following day. Even if that person exists, you would not feel you have the liberty to just do that. You will have to consider the costs, the schedules you both have. Enjoy this liberty to decide if you want to hop on a sleeper train after work and wake up in another state the following day.

You can eat whatever you want.

Food is the source of many conflicts, and it’s not petty all the time. Conflicts could be due to varying preferences in the family, and could be as grave as when there isn’t enough food on the table are common in very young families.

friends dining together

Living alone means you’re only responsible for yourself. If you don’t feel like cooking, you could simply decide to have food delivered. If you don’t feel like eating, then you don’t. Sure there could be couples who mind their own business when it comes to food, but it’s very rare as eating is also an opportunity for couples to get together. If you schedule cooking, your skills and taste in food might also vary, so both have to always compromise on your food expectations. Cooking for each other, going on romantic dinner dates are great at the start of a relationship, but once it becomes routine, it could be triggers for conflicts.

You can meet with friends whenever you want.

Unless you had grown up together and had the same set of friends, it is not often that you like each other’s circles. Even if you get to know each other’s friends, you won’t necessarily want to hang out with the same people. There could even be friends of your partner who you won’t like and vice versa. This problem, of course, doesn’t exist if you’re single.

You set your own pace.

The most important fact of being single is you live your life according to how you want to live it. You don’t have to think if your partner would approve of moving to a different country to take on a good job. You don’t have to worry if your partner would be ok if you buy a property in the mountains, or get a new car, or throw out the old TV and get a new one. You define everything, from the setting of your goal to the pacing of how you would want to get there.

Later, you might want to have someone with you in your life. But while you’re not at that stage, enjoy your single life.

If you prefer a single life, don’t get pressured by society’s expectations. Those who tell you to do something you don’t want to do are not going to be the ones living your life. You decide how you will live it.

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